Justin Rant
by tarynmunchkin
Summary: My view on Justin from Another Form of the Avian Bird-flu, by St. Fang of Boredom. You will not understand this story if you have not read that. A one-shot. Rated T because I'm paranoid.


**Hey everyone!!! I'm so sorry I didn't post this yesterday! I completely forgot what day it was. Forgive me? **

**This is probably the weirdest thing I ever wrote, but it wasn't my fault. My computer pissed me off and then gave me a way to write, which is something everybody knows not to do. So don't blame me. (I'm not saying that I'm not crazy, just that it's not my fault that the craziness had an opportunity to come out, m'kay?) **

**But, on the other hand, my friends and I almost died laughing when we read it at school together. I really completely zoned out when I wrote it and when I read it over I considered the nut house as a new housing option for me. So I am aware that I'm crazy and probably need help, but I just can't be bothered to do anything about it.**

**You will not understand this unless you've read Another Form of the Avian Bird-flu, okay? So if you haven't read it then go read it until you find out who Justin is. If you feel that that is enough then come read this, but there are spoilers for parts after the Justin scenario, okay?**

**Enjoy! **

Weird openness again... I'm back for the same reason as last time... kinda. It's actually because the internet won't connect (which is the similarity) and I wanna read ch.20 of Another Form of the Avian Bird-flu. I need to see if Fang or Ig win the trial that is being held (or at least I think they're going to hold one) to try get Fang to pay child-support for Justin. It's okay Ig. I will get rich really, really fast and marry you and buy a mansion and we can raise Justin together! But a quick Q: How can you be sure Justin's a boy? I mean, you aren't even showing yet! Whoa! I just realised how weird this is!!!! This is not exactly what I'd call a "turn-on", Iggy having Fangs' child.... Can't you have an abortion and then _I_ can rather carry _your_ child? Think about it. Hold on! Didn't you use PROTECTION!?!? If you didn't then what in the world were you doing with the"... protective things"? Now I'm mad at you. I always loved you more than Fang did, anyway, and I should have taught you a lesson right at the beginning when you started using him to make me jealous anyway!!! And now (although I only realised it now) Ella!?! You better watch your back, Iggy!!!! And, I agree with Fang, you and Justin can just go live in a cardboard box!!!! And don't think you're coming anywhere near the corner of my mansion with it, either!!!! You stand more chance of getting married to Johnny Depp or Robert Pattinson and living, with Justin, Katy Perry's love child and Lucas Rossi's nephew on your own, private freaking island somewhere to the south of the Bahamas!!!!!!

(I'm soooo gonna save this)

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Ok. Internet's still trying to piss me off so I'm back. Yes, it's the same day and yes I'm still mad at Ig, even though I don't know what the hell happened to Justin. But I know he didn't lose him cause he seems very happy, the ass. I forgot what I wanted to say.... Oh, yeah!!!!! I have only read to the end of chapter 22 and Ig was just freaking out over going to the f***ing shops with Ella!!!!!!!!! What's with him and Ella!?! This is the second fanfic that I've read where he and Ella end up together!!!!!!! And I've only read 4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One, of which, only included Max and Fang and some other dude that doesn't even play a role in Maximum Ride. In the other one, at least, _I'm_ his girlfriend. (he, he!) But I'll bet that if Tummy Monster didn't want revenge on me it would have ended up with him either freaking out over her or making out with her or worse!... Yeah, I'll leave that to your/my imagination. Feel free to be as gross as your heart desires! The grosser, the better (and if that isn't my speciality, I dunno what is) Okay, I've run out of things to say. Will have to read more and get back to it.

* * *

Yup! My theory has been confirmed: Justin still lives... for now anyway. Why would I want to hurt poor Justin? Because he represents everything that's wrong with me and my Iggy! So, from today forth, I officially despise Justin. That's all I have to say for the time being. (Yes, it is still the same day)

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This is completely unrelated: Fang is sooo funny when he's on his Night Quills!!!! I would say that what Iggy wrote on Fangs' blog was funny but I'm mad at him. You can guess that by the fact that I'm using his full name. (Still the same day... I'm just really bored)

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Aaaaahhh... the wisdom of a child (in this case, referring to Gazzy). Don't ask what brought this on. I'm just trying to distract myself from how much I really, _REALLY_ hate Ella!!!!! And how incomprehensively angry I am at Iggy! I'm sorry... anger makes me use big words.... not even sure it was spelled right. Or if I spelled "spelled" right. I really need to learn to spell that word. Yaay!!!!! Distracted myself from Iggy!!!!! Oh, wait... damn. (Yes, it is STILL the same day... tell ya what: I'll do a double liney thing when I switch days, kay? Kay.)

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Hi again!

Doing that double liney thing was fun... I actually have nothing to say at this time, now that I think about it...................... Sorry, got side-tracked by how fun it is to press the full stop button on my new schmancy roll-up keyboard... that I actually hate because it is a lot harder to press the buttons so sometimes it types the ones I press and sometimes it doesn't. Oh! It also doesn't make any sound so, although it's great for stealthy midnight-typing when you're supposed to be asleep, you also can't tell if it actually typed the letter without looking at the screen. But, other than this and being as tired as hell, I'm in a good mood... also besides being bored out of my mind 'cause I couldn't go to school.

So, sadly, Iggy got off easy today. But that doesn't mean I'm not mad at him. He's having another child, a girl called Janet (what are the odds?) of Fangs', so I'm definitely mad at him. But I'm also happy 'cause I found that the people at the orphan russianage beat Justin, so it's all good............................................................................... Got distracted again, so I'm gonna go see if the internet loves me again.

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My internet loved me for 2 whole chapters... Yaay! (sarcasm).... I wonder what Justin looks like? He must be gorgeous! Stop it, Taryn! -slaps through face- Alright, my sanity is back. Boredom makes you do crazy things sometimes... I'm gonna go check my internet again.

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Wow, a whole, single chapter this time! Why does my internet hate me so? I have a mind to skulk off to my room and read Twilight or write chapter 2 of Sparkle Boy or listen to my most precious possession besides my manga (my iPod)... My happy mood is beginning to fade slowly out of existence. It is very easy to piss off a tired person. I am going to try again and hope for the best (the best probably isn't good enough)

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Ok, so I had this weird feeling that I probably should tell you the date: 21 October (2009 for if I find this, one day after I've turned 21) I have nothing to say except that I really hate my connection 'cause, this time, I only had 4 chapters left to read, but anyway.

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AAAAAAARRRRGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I REALLY AM BEGINNING TO THINK IT'S NOT WORTH THE EXTENT OF THE IRRITATION THAT COMES WITH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm talking about reading fan fiction, BTW.

* * *

I just did a bad thing and ranted on the review for Another Form of the Avian Bird-flu.

Oops.

**Okay, since that didn't really have an ending and I want to keep it as genuine and original as possible, I will tell you my current plan for Justin's demise, if you can call it that...**

**Here it is!**

So, I'm going to sell Justin to slave traders while Iggy isn't looking, then the slave traders will sell him to pimps who will get him addicted to drugs, beat him, and turn him into a male prostitute.

I will then buy him back and give him back to Iggy who will be unable to support him because he'll be an old man living in a leaky cardboard box on the side of the road in New York, with no money.

This way, Iggy will be heartbroken by how his "beautiful baby boy" turned out and Justin will either end up going to jail for killing someone for drugs or he will commit suicide. I like this plan a lot.

Oh, by the way, Iggy hasn't gotten laid since Justin was stolen about 20 years ago. Not once. MWA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Yeah, yeah, yeah, I need help; I'm insane; I need to be put into a mental institute. I've heard it all before. If you wanna say something like that, please try to be original? I wanna hear your opinions on my mental health, just not all the same things over and over again.**

**Please R&R. Tell me how much you love Justin and think that was the cruellest thing you've ever heard...**

**Or, even better, agree with me! Maybe I'm right! C'mon all the girls who have crushes on Iggy! You know that you think I'm right deep down.**

**Oh, I think I should mention that this train of thought was what killed my love for Iggy. I used to have a major crush on him until I decided to think.**

**Thanx for reading! Hope I didn't scar you too badly! Don't forget to R&R! **

**Also, Happy Holidays!**


End file.
